My Birth Story

Well, we did it!

Our darling, perfect, beautiful, baby girl arrived on Saturday, June 18th at 11:02 in the morning. It was such an incredible experience; one I will never forget. It took a long time to get to where we are today, but looking back at it – it seems like just a blink of an eye. It was indeed a long journey to bring her into this world – and now, I am going to tell you about it. There may be some graphic images and maybe a little too much information for some people’s taste -but this is what happened and I don’t want to leave any of it out.

I was very eager to go into labor. Throughout my whole pregnancy, I never truly had any fears save for one: being overdue. Now, it is extremely common for your first child to be late. In fact, the average is approximately 8 days late – which would be 41 weeks and one day. This is all well and good. Of course at the end of the pregnancy, I was so anxious to see my baby girl. And I was so afraid of having to be induced. In order to deliver at the birth center, the baby must be born between 37 weeks (full term) and 42 weeks. So, once I passed that 40 week mark, I began to get… well… scared. We had prepared so fully and with so much energy and effort to have a natural birth at Beach Cities Midwifery. The last thing I wanted was to have to be induced at the hospital… which would then invite a plethora of other medical interventions and I would have a 33% chance of having to have a C-Section. So, I started taking things into my own hands. I tried every natural process to get labor started…

I walked every day. I took long, warm baths with some essential oils, I took Evening Primrose Oil to soften and “ripen” the cervix, I had sex, I constantly bounced on a “birth ball” (which is really just a yoga ball) to open my pelvis, I continued to do yoga through my 40th week, etc. This wasn’t getting me anywhere and I was getting impatient. So, I started looking into acupuncture. Acupuncture has been used for thousands of years for medical ailments and to help induce labor. There are pressure points all over the body which can help stimulate the uterus and the production of Oxytocin (the hormone that causes contractions). So, I thought – why not – let’s give this a try!

So, on Monday June 13th (my 40-week mark) I had my first acupuncture session. Essentially what happens is you lay in a chair (or a table) and a bunch of needles get placed all over your arms, hands, legs, face, neck, ears, etc… in specific places for specific reasons. So, that’s what happened – then I sat there for 1.5 hours letting the needles work their magic. I felt a few contractions during my sessions and continued to have minimal contractions thereafter. But, nothing really happened.

I had my 40 week checkup at Beach Cities on Wednesday, June 15th and a pelvic exam was performed. I was dilated to 1 cm and my cervix was effacing “very nicely.” This was great to hear! With the first pregnancy, typically you efface before you fully dilate. So, the fact that the effacement (thinning of the cervix) was going well, I was in good spirits! But, again I was impatient. So, I had another acupuncture session that night at about 9:00pm.

Success! The next morning I was having contractions approximately 20-30 minutes apart. This is not labor, but it was more than I had ever felt! As you are supposed to ignore labor until you can’t, I went on about my day. I met Alexa for breakfast to give her some envelopes and a paper sample for the wedding invitations. And, we sat and chatted for a while. Then, I went and met Conrad for lunch. I returned home around 2:00pm that day and my contractions had not gotten any closer, so I just continued doing chores for the rest of the day, and I watched a movie so I did not exert too much energy in the event that this actually turned into something. I think Conrad got home around 5:00pm.

Through the rest of the early evening, my contractions got closer together – by about 8:00 pm, they were about 10-12 minutes apart. So, now I was in very early labor. I informed Staci, our doula, how much closer they had gotten and she gave me a ring around 9:00 pm. Unfortunately she had a family emergency and had to head to Fresno, but she had Melissa contact me (her partner and backup), again, in the event labor progressed. Melissa called me and we chatted about what I was feeling and how I was feeling and she said to contact her when and if I need her.

Throughout the rest of the evening, my contractions strengthened and continued to grow closer together. We called Beach Cities at about 2:45 am and informed them that my contractions were now about 4 minutes apart – but my water had not broken. BJ told us to call the doula, so we did. Melissa came over around 3:30 am and my contractions were still about 4 minutes apart. I labored and labored and labored and eventually my contractions were event closer… 2-3 minutes apart by about 5:30 am… They were very intense. The pain was bearable as I had Melissaand Conrad coaching me through them, and massaging the areas that hurt the most.

At this point it started going downhill.

At this time, the contractions started to get further apart. They were still quite intense, but now there was more time between them. This continued to happen until about 7:00 or 8:00 am… until they were about 5 minutes apart. We called Beach Cities and they said to come in. So at about 8:30, we headed over there so I could be evaluated. I wasn’t very hopeful as I knew labor had slowed, if not stopped. But, I was checked anyway… I wished the work I had done had opened my cervix a bit. But, I was only 3 cm dilated. So, home we went. It was about 10:00 am at this point on Friday morning. I was a bit discouraged at this point. And, I was absolutely exhausted. The midwife that checked me, Sheila, said I should go home and get as much rest as I could – she even offered me some sort of sleep aid.But, as I had never taken that sort of drug before – I really didn’t want to risk having a bad reaction in the event that labor picked up again. So, we went home – and I crawled into bed and tried to sleep as much as I could – even though I was still having contractions. We sent Melissa home. There was no point in her coming back to the house to watch me sleep.

I was able to sleep til about 2:00 pm. If you can call what I got “sleep.” As I was still having sporadic contractions (both in time and in intensity), I didn’t ever fall into a deep sleep. But, something was better than nothing. Conrad got some sleep as well. He had been up even longer than I had – as he had worked a full day on Thursday.

So here I was at 2:00pm on Friday and labor had basically started over. I was virtually back to square one. Throughout the rest of the day, my contractions got closer together and more intense. We watched movies (Episodes 3 & 4 of the original Star Wars trilogy 👍) and I tried to distract myself and catch a few Zzzzs in between. I took a bath at about 10:00 pm to either slow down or speed up the contractions before bed as Melissa suggested. By 1:00 am I was in complete distress. I was having an emotional breakdown. My contractions were very close together and so incredibly painful. We called Melissa again and she said to take another bath to help ease the pain. So, I labored in the tub for about 30-40 minutes and Conrad called Beach Cities and we were told to come in.

We called Melissa and she headed there as well.

We arrived at about 1:00 am on Saturday morning and I was again checked to see how I was dilating. I was at 5 cm. Again, not what I wanted to hear – but, the good news was that we could stay. The bad news was that the room wasn’t ready for me yet as they had JUST had a birth. So, it took them about an hour to clean and prepare the room for me. So, I labored in the exam room that whole time. I was so incredibly uncomfortable… sitting on a chair… trying to stay calm and relaxed through the contractions which were about 2:00 minutes apart at this point. It was so unpleasant, and I knew we still had a long way to go.

Finally at about 2:00am I was able to get into my room. And I got in the tub as soon as it was ready.

I was so happy. Well, as happy as I could be between contractions that felt like they were ripping me apart. The tub was exponentially better than our tub at home. I actually had room to move around. I chose to basically sit in a Child’s Pose draped over the side of the tub, sitting on my knees with my legs open to help open my pelvis and hopefully help little one descend into my pelvis. Luckily for me, this time the tub made my contractions progress even further. But, it still took a very long time. I was in the tub until about 8:30 am. I am not quite sure how long my transition was, but it seemed endless.

Mom arrived at the birth center about 6:00 am and she came in to let me know she was there. It was nice to know she was there if I needed her. She sat in the waiting room during the rest of my labor and delivery.

Transitioning was definitely the worst thing I had experienced. I would have 4 or 5 contractions right on top of each other without a break. And, then I would try to sleep when I did in fact get a break – only to be woken up by extreme pain and discomfort.

There was a shift change I think around 8:00 am. And, lucky for me – BJ was now my midwife. This made me extremely happy. Not that I doubted the abilities of Sheila – I had never worked with her before. I had seen BJ multiple times.

By about 8:30, BJ checked me again and I was at about 9cm dilated. My bag of waters was still in tact. So, she came in and said that I had a little lip of cervix left holding little one back. So, how about we get that pushed out of the way, break your water, and have a baby. This was the best thing I had heard in the last two days. I got out of the tub and they prepared to break my water.

I hopped on the bed and BJ told me to push with my next contraction… so I did. It was not fun, but she broke the bag of waters and with the next few contractions was able to move the remaining part of the cervix out of the way so we could get this show on the road.

By this point, I was so incredibly exhausted. I had been up for about 2 days with minimal sleep, minimal food (I ate as much as I possibly could, but had lost my appetite),  and my energy level was basically on empty. Originally I really wanted to have a water birth, but by this point I was set up on the bed and could not bring myself to get up and continue to support myself in the tub. Delivering on your back is not ideal, but at the very least, it offered some respite between contractions and pushing. I rested as much as I could between as I had no idea how long i had until the next one came.

With each contraction I was supposed to hold back my knees – with Conrad on one side and Melissa on the other helping hold them back – and “push through the bottom” It took me a little while to figure out what that meant… but I eventually got the hang of it. Through the next 2 hours, I pushed with as much vigor and energy as I possible could. Some were good pushes, some weren’t. And, yes. I pooped during my pushes. Did I care? Absolutely not. I had read so many birth stories, I was pretty realistic about it. They tell you to push through the bottom… what do you expect to happen? And, they were really great about cleaning it away as soon as it happened. I didn’t see it, and I didn’t care if Conrad saw it. I was pushing a human out of my body. It’s not going to be pretty.

As each contraction ended, I hoped that I would be given a decent amount of time to catch my breath before the next one. Conrad and Melissa were sure to help  to keep me hydrated as I was sweating so much. Melissa gave me water, Conrad gave me coconut water.

With each push they told me she was getting closer and closer. This was all well and good, but I just felt pressure. But, finally BJ could see her. And she said “She has dark brown hair!” WHAT? She has HAIR?! This was a huge surprise to me. I was 100% convinced she would be bald… as I was bald until I was 2 and Conrad didn’t have much hair either. That, and her hair is dark? Surprising as well! As both of us had lighter hair, once we did have hair, as children.

Once she got a little further down, BJ had either Michelle or Alicia (the birth assistants) hold a mirror so I could see her. It took a few times to get the right angle, but eventually I saw her! I could see the hair. She was coming!. This was a HUGE motivation for me. Because, at this point I was beginning to doubt myself. It wasn’t that I wanted drugs. I could handle the pain. I was just so tired. I didnt feel like I had any energy left to keep pushing. She was going to live in my birth canal forever.

But, once I saw her, and everyone around me was giving me support and telling me I could do it… a little fire was lit inside me. I wanted this to end. I wanted to hold my baby girl.

So, I kept pushing and pushing and pushing. Eventually she started to crown. Man oh man, was this uncomfortable. Talk about being ripped apart. The burning, the pressure. Now I was hoping my contractions would be closer together so I didn’t have to just sit through this discomfort. BJ said she was very close – just a few more pushes and she would be out. I said “deal.” So, with the next 2 contractions, her little head popped out. I felt some not so fun stuff when that happened – but I was immediately distracted when BJ said “reach down and take your baby!” OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!

The look on Conrad’s face when she came out is priceless. And, exactly the way I felt.

Blair Elizabeth finally came into this world at 11:02 am. We did it. I could hardly believe it.

All of the pain. All of discomfort. All of the pressure. All of the self-doubt. It all disappeared. We did it.

Right as I got her onto my chest, she let her presence known. She started to cry immediately. She also pooped right on me and Conrad, and then also peed on me as to say “YES I AM HERE!”

I was in heaven. BJ told me I had two tears that would need to be stitched up after the placenta was delivered. I knew I tore. I felt it right before she came out. It is what it is. Obviously I hoped I wouldn’t tear, but at this point I was just happy to have a baby on my chest. After the placenta came, Conrad got to cut the cord. We let the placenta completely stop pulsating before cutting the cord as to make sure little Blair got all of the blood and oxygen she needed.

We laid there for a while. It took a while to get me all stitched up. That wasn’t fun. Neither were the uterus massages. But, I had just been through quite an ordeal, and nothing else really compared. Plus, I was so happy… nothing was going to rain on my parade – which yes – that was on my birthing playlist.

Blair was so alert right after birth. She was staring up at me and Conrad. We covered her up to keep her warm, and kept her naked against my body to help regulate her body temperature. She just stared at me and I was in complete awe of how beautiful and perfect she was. She stayed awake for about 30 minutes, taking in her new world. Oddly enough, that’s about how long it took to stitch me up.

Once I was all sewn up, I was able to move up into a better position on the bed. I was eager to feed Blair as I know it is important to establish latching. We did get her to latch, but then she fell asleep almost immediately as to say “look mom, I can do it. Now let me sleep.” And I did. She slept on and off for the next 4 hours, only really waking up when her vitals were checked, and/or to have her diaper changed and to get dressed for the first time. Conrad had the honor of dressing her in her first outfit!

It was so cute watching him dress her – being oh-so-careful. And, as she was getting dressed, so was I! We were ready to go home! We got a quick picture of me and baby Blair before they wheeled me out to the car. Conrad had pulled the car to the front of the building to cool it down – as it was about 100 degrees outside that day.

We were home by 4:30 – ready to start our lives as a family with our perfect little angel baby.